The Penguin Don’t Surf
Look at my arm right there. You see that? I got that when I was 18 years old, and I’ll tell you something: I regret it, cause this tattoo don’t come off. I have a tattoo of a cow’s head because I loved that cheese then. So I get the cow, and I go in there and I’m a little drunk… and I said, “Gimme that cow head from that cheese, I love that cheese… ” And now I have a cow, a cheese cow on my arm, Brendan. Don’t get a tattoo, that’s what I’m telling you. Play soccer. Brendon, take a look at my chest. You know what that is right there? That’s the woman from the Chiquita Banana. I got that tattooed on my chest. I am an idiot. I’ve got trademarked products all over my body. It’s like going to a market. Because I was drunk one night. Don’t live like me.
14th century Bolognese painting
And on the pedestal, these words appear:
My name is Sunn Model T, amplifier of amplifiers
Gaze upon my stack, ye mighty, and despair!
Encoffination - O’ Hell, Shine in Thy Whited Sepulchres (2011)
att’n Mountain Goats, I will be holding a seminar on the brand new miracle of electricity and how to use it to make music that people will be able to stay awake through.
And yet some old dude in Yob gets to crash my metal show and bore the shit out of me.
Yeah, he needs some Standard Issue Indie Rock Vocals.™ Even if his solo work is boring, the man knows how to play a riff. Maybe the Mountain Goats could do a training montage with him to teach him how to play trendier grandpas guitar music. I’d watch that.